Good Morning! I’m coming at you at a different time than normal but it’s because life has been terribly crazy for the past few weeks. Illnesses and unexpected family emergencies have had me running around like a crazy person. My husband was in the hospital this weekend as well so it’s been tough. Luckily he’s doing much better and he’s home!
I’m incredibly blessed with great friends who sent me messages and reached out to help me while Jordan was in the hospital. Many offered to bring me food and clothes and others offered to take care of Snowflake for us. While thankful, I really didn’t take any offers. I felt like I had to be the “perfect wife” and do it all. While Jordan was sleeping due to the morphine, I ran to the grocery store, started a load of laundry, and walked the dog. Guys, I was ridiculous. I was so determined to do it all by myself that I was borderline neurotic.
I think I was numb in the sense that I didn’t want to process what was going on. When I was at Aldi, I went up and down the same aisle because I kept forgetting what I needed to get. Even with the list in front of me, I couldn’t concentrate. The house was too quiet with Jordan gone so I would turn on Law and Order and have it playing in the background so I wouldn’t burst into tears while I cooked. I let Snowflake roam the yard while watered my plant and tried to remember whether or not I had showered that morning (I had.).
Mid way through the second day of his hospital stay, I couldn’t take it anymore and I was a sobbing mess at his bedside. I knew he would be fine but I couldn’t do everything myself. That’s when Jordan decided to unload this huge nugget of wisdom on me, it’s okay to ask for help. Husbands, amiright? By Sunday night, I had so much help from others. From feeding Snowflake to mowing our yard, people stepped up to help!
No one likes to admit that they’re stubborn. Frankly, I don’t like to admit when I’m struggling. I want to do it myself even if I run myself to the ground. However, this experience taught me that people are willing to help. People who truly care about you want to help you any way you can. Asking for help in a time of need doesn’t make me a bad wife.
Most people are at a loss at a time like this so you may have to ask for help in specific areas. You can usually tell who’s sincere and willing to do anything for you. I was incredibly touched by those who texted and messaged me. Even though it seemed pretty insignificant, it meant the world to me. So many people asked about Jordan and some hadn’t even met him in real life!
This may not be something you’re struggling with but it was definitely an eye opening experience for me. I am so very thankful for all the amazing people that I have surrounded myself with who go above and beyond to help me.
Asking for help doesn’t make you a terrible person and chances are you have a group of people willing to help out in any way they can.